Just A Kiss
by Ava Cabot
Summary: "It just a kiss. Nothing more," he told himself.


Miyumi  
  
Just A Kiss  
  
A/N: I AM STUPID. I lost the four reviews I had for taking this thing off. It was an accident!!! Please come back and review!! I am sorry!!!  
  
~*~  
  
- Just A Kiss-  
By: Miyumi  
  
~*~  
  
"Wotcher, Remus," she said tiredly, stirring her coffee for the twentieth time.  
  
Remus had kept track. He felt there was nothing worth doing, nothing that cold tear him away from just sitting at the kitchen table, aimlessly.  
  
For number twelve, Grimmauld Place, was missing one person.  
  
"I thought I heard him last night," said Remus quietly.  
  
"I slept in his bed last night," replied Tonks. "It smelled like the forest, rugged and tough and wild. It smelled like him."  
  
Remus wasn't surprised. He knew that he wasn't the only one who heard her footsteps, then falls, as she tried to creep into her cousin's room, then her heaving sobs, though slightly muffled by the walls.  
  
Remus knew she wasn't the only one who cried themselves to sleep at night, staring at the ceiling, wishing what happened had never taken place.  
  
It had only been a few weeks.  
  
"How's Harry?" she asked, sipping her coffee, muffling her mouth.  
  
"Still in shock. Loosing him was hard enough on us, but for Harry, it was like loosing his older brother."  
  
"You didn't say his name."  
  
"Neither did you."  
  
They were silent. Silence was the only thing that could be heard now at number twelve. While the Muggles next door kept on thudding their horrible music, shouting and laughing, pretending the world had not lost one of it's own, the remainder of the Order continued to mourn. Even Mrs. Black was silent, occasionally screaming for the blood traitor that was her son to stop hiding and come out. Even she couldn't believe her son was dead.  
  
No one wanted too.  
  
Remus rose from his chair, pacing the room in his typically slow, long stride. Tonks and the other inhabitants were used to him walking around at night. At least he still rose from his bed. For a week after it happened, Remus refused to leave his room, choosing to lie in his chambers, staring at a wall, trying to remember what life was like before he, the only man that truly mattered to him, died.  
  
Tonks watched him, peering out from her exhausted, tear-stained eyes. Too upset to morph her appearance, and too strung over the memory of Sirius, she let her hair remain its true color, mahogany brown, shining full and bright, no matter how mournful she acted.  
  
"I can still hear his voice," whispered Remus. "He should still be here. He shouldn't be gone, dammit."  
  
"I know, Remus, I know."  
  
Remus turned on her.  
  
"How could you know?" he asked icily.  
  
Tonks watched as his eyes burned fire. "You don't know," he repeated.  
  
"You don't know the pain. The agony over loosing him. The sorrow, the mourning, and the sadness I'm going through. You don't know!"  
  
Tonks stood, her chair falling over. "I do know, Remus J. Lupin, and whether you want to spend your days wailing over him is up to you. I'm going to do something about it."  
  
Remus glared at her. "I can grieve for him. Any way I choose."  
  
Tonks threw up her hands. "You think he'd want you to sit at the table, wasting away? He'd want you to be okay, not dead."  
  
"If I were dead, I could see my friends again."  
  
She stiffened. "If you were dead, then we would be left to mourn for two causalities of this place."  
  
"What do you care?" he asked angrily, turning away.  
  
"I do care!" she cried, throwing her cup down. "You think I don't hear you crying at night? You think I don't hear you shouting his name? You think I don't know the pain?"  
  
"You're a child!"  
  
"I'm an Auror."  
  
"A childish one."  
  
"At least I'm not afraid to admit my grievances," she shouted hotly.  
  
Remus stopped. "What are you saying?"  
  
She walked over to him, staring eye to eye.  
  
"Instead of sitting around, pretending I'm not sad, I go out and do what I can. I grieve, but I try to move on. I act on my feelings."  
  
"Really?" he said, staring at her.  
  
She became hesitant, her face turning red. "Yes," she answered, a little too quickly.  
  
They were close together.  
  
Too close.  
  
They were standing right against each other, Remus taller than her by a head-span. She gripped the marble counter behind her tighter.  
  
She could have counted his eyelashes.  
  
He could have seen every sparkle in her dark eyes.  
  
"Nymhadora," he trailed, his hands hovering around her waist.  
  
"Tonks," she said softly. She closed her eyes and felt his lips upon her hers. She reached up, placing her arms lightly around his neck, brushing her lips tantalizingly over his.  
  
Suddenly, he broke off. Both of them sucked in oxygen, the need apparent. For a moment they just stared each other, lost in each other's eyes.  
  
"We can't do this," he said quietly, tracing a finger down her face, her jaw line, and finally her neck. With that, he tore away, running out of the kitchen and down the hall, closing his down and clicking the lock shut.  
  
She sank to the floor, touching her lips gently, for just a moment ago; Remus Lupin's were upon hers.  
  
Inside his room, Remus fell onto his bed, the hot sheets suffocating his breathing, threatening to asphyxiate.  
  
"It was just a kiss," he repeated to himself softly.  
  
"Just a kiss."  
  
~*~ 


End file.
